Don't Pick Up Boyfriends From the Trash Bin

Zhu Shoucheng’s two slit-like greenish-yellow eyes slant through the bandage, and his breathing becomes laboured.

”Ah, I forgot, there’s no surveillance in that area, you have no way to prove I hit you.” Chi Xiaochi tsked with regret, “What a shame, if you had gone to sue me I would have been able to take this recording to the police, and this ……”

Chi Xiaochi pulls out a washed-up photograph and flicks it in front of him.

The photograph still smells of fresh developer water.

Zhu Shoucheng let out a cry of pain and anxiety, but Chi Xiaochi had already retrieved the photo and tapped it against his palm: “A highly respected teacher, molesting a student in an alley in the middle of the night, such news is probably more worthy of gossip than a good student falling to his death from a burglary, don’t you think?”

Zhu Shoucheng’s body trembled lightly as he was out of breath, and a bo of hot blood rushed to his badly damaged brain, making him dizzy: “Ah… ah ……”

Chi Xiaochi came close to the bed, shoving all the worst information into his head: “What did you say? Teacher, speak louder, I can’t hear you. …… Where do you want me to post the picture? The bulletin board at the front of the school, or to all your colleagues’ mobile phones, or maybe I should make thousands of flyers and distribute them to parents outside your school? To show them how you, a dying old cow, plan to eat the young grass?”

With that, he put the photos back into the compartment of his book bag and put them away properly before turning his face away, “I have to work out how these two items will come in handy. Don’t worry, I’ll take good care of them for you until you’re well. How they are to be used, after that, I would love to hear your opinion.”

As the last few words were being spoken, Zhu Shoucheng’s son came in with a large glass of hot water.

Chi Xiaochi then naturally changed the subject, “Mr Zhu, get some rest and get well soon. I will visit you often.”

He stood up, faced Zhu Shoucheng’s son and smiled, “Uncle, I’ll go first then.”

Zhu Shoucheng’s son’s knowledge of the previous “burglary” case was limited to his father’s oral account, and Zhu Shoucheng could not tell his son the same story he had told the police, lest he go and question Chi Xiaochi and expose himself instead, so his impression of Chi Xiaochi was not bad: “Thank you for bringing something. But my dad he’s very badly injured now and the doctor has said he can only eat a liquid diet, so you’d better take this apple back with you before it goes bad ……”

Chi Xiaochi didn’t push back and reached into the net, “Uncle, I’ll take one. The rest can be made into apple juice and eaten with the liquid food. Apples are good for your health, so let Mr Zhu eat more of them and you will live a long life.”

He suspected that the apple was poisoned, but he was afraid that his son would report the incident to the police and the recording and photos would be revealed.

Such a sweet mouth made Zhu Shoucheng’s son feel a little better about the boy.

He sent Chi Xiaochi out the door and told Chi Xiaochi that he was very busy at work and if his father insisted on staying here, he would hire a nanny to look after him. When the time comes, he also asked Chi Xiaochi to visit the house more often and look after his father’s health for him.

Chi Xiaochi smiled genuinely and said, “Definitely.”

After seeing Zhu Shoucheng’s son back to the ward, Chi Xiaochi went to the nurses’ station.

At the nurse’s station, the little apple-faced nurse who had just shown him the way was still there.

Chi Xiaochi’s smile was so bright it was blinding: “Thank you, sister nurse.”

”You’re welcome.” Anyone likes a polite and good looking boy, and the little apple-faced nurse was no exception as she leaned forward on her arms and asked him, “So he can show you his homework?”

Chi Xiaochi scratched the back of his head in embarrassment, “I didn’t think Mr Zhu was really that badly hurt.”

”Why would I lie to you.” The young nurse shook her head, “He was injured like that, his head was so edematous that he couldn’t see anything, and you said you wanted to show him his homework. Not to mention the words, the oldest living person hanging around in front of him may not even be able to see clearly ……”

As we were talking, the emergency caller on the wall rang at first.

The young nurse immediately aborted the small talk.

On the other end of the pager was the anxious voice of Zhu Shoucheng’s son: “Someone! Somebody! My dad is in bad shape!”

The little nurse got up in a hurry and went forward to check the situation.

Chi Xiaochi also turned away with a big smile on her face and brushed past the doctors and nurses running in front of her.

He held up the apple and took a gentle bite.

The granularity of the apple skin and the fresh sweetness of the flesh blossom between the lips and tongue of Chi Xiaochi.

Chi Xiaochi knows everything.

After disposing of the blood from the iron bar, he then roasted the surface of the bar from end to end with a lighter, went to a suburban dump and threw it into a pile of rubbish.

He had checked the information and the recording was not admissible as direct evidence of the person’s guilt.

Last night, he listened to the recording several times and confirmed that, apart from the whimpering sound of the boy’s mouth and nose being covered, Zhu Shoucheng’s words could be explained away by saying that he was “borrowing gloves from a student”.

Then Chi Xiaochi would not give him any chance to explain himself to the public.

Since he could not prove his guilt by producing the recordings, he had to create his own prison and lock Zhu Shoucheng in it.

He wanted Zhu Shoucheng to keep the matter rotting in his stomach, rotting it into a bitter water, rotting it into poison, which could only be stored until it poisoned himself.

In order to gag Zhu Shoucheng, Chi Xiaochi needed something more powerful than a recording to hold the old fox’s neck.

So he went to the nurse to ask if Zhu Shoucheng, who had recently been removed from danger, could see well.

Having received a negative answer, what he had on hand would come in handy.

Sitting in the small garden of the hospital, Chi Xiaochi took the so-called “photo” out of his school bag.

The situation was critical and he simply did not have the tools to be able to film.

So he brought in a photograph that he treasured and borrowed a little developer and applied it to the back of the photograph, deliberately putting Zhu Shoucheng under a spell.

And in this maze, there was not even a single person, it was a white blanket of snow.

Above the snow, imprinted with two figures holding hands.

Lou Ying and Chi Xiaochi, one 13 and one 11.

On a snowy day they came out to play and had a snowball fight with the other children in the silo.

Together, the two men are invincible in battle.

After winning, Chi Xiaochi, who had rolled all over the snow, came lurching closer at Lou Ying’s call and knelt down while she brushed the snowflakes from his head before they melted into his hair.

Chi Xiaochi tilted his head and looked at him for a long time before calling him softly, “Brother.”

Lou Ying concentrated: “Hmm?”

Chi Xiaochi said, “Brother, I want to roll around in the snow with you.”

Lou Ying’s hand stopped and he said, helplessly and amused, “That’s childish. It’s not like you’ve never seen snow before.”

Chi Xiaochi is a scoundrel: “I want it.”

Lou Ying thought for a moment, “Well then, I’ll hear the reason.”

Chi Xiaochi’s head is full of fantastically romantic ideas: “If we were two pandas, wouldn’t we feel happy rolling from one end to the other in the snow together?”

Lou Ying : “OK, you play the panda, I’m the keeper who specialises in feeding pandas.”

Chi Xiaochi justified: “No, I’m the only panda, how silly is that?”

In the end, the keeper compromised and agreed to be a giant panda who would accompany the cubs in their silliness.

Behind the silo, there is a large area of untouched, flat snow, knee-deep enough for two people to toss around for a while.

As a result, Chi Xiaochi got a little embarrassed after a couple of tumbles himself and rolled up out of the snow: “It seems really silly.”

Lou Ying also rolled up from the snow and wiped the snow foam from his mouth: “Silly.”

Chi Xiaochi looked at him and harrumphed.

Lou Ying was a little annoyed, “You’re laughing at me, you know what you look like.”

Chi Xiaochi The little animal shook its head quickly as if shaking its fur, shaking a large piece of snow off its head and face, “I don’t know, I don’t know.”

Lou Ying got up, went back home, got a repaired second-hand camera and clicked a picture of the panda print on the snow with two hands holding hands.

Chi Xiaochi wondered, “What’s this for?”

Lou Ying laughed and replied, “It’s a memento for the two pandas.”

Chi Xiaochi walked out of the hospital and instead of going back to school, he went back home to the spot where Lou Ying fell.

In the winter of a few years ago they held hands and branded two human forms in the snow.

In the not-so-distant summer, his body crashed to the ground, leaving a puddle of dark red blood and a human form made of duct tape on the floor.

And in the present, Chi Xiaochi staggered out onto the snow-covered ground and collapsed on his back.

Snow penetrated the clothes on his back while he lifted the photograph he had been cupping in his hand and pressed it against his feverish cheek, blocking out the light shining on his face.

On the back of the photograph is an inscription by Lou Ying after the photograph has been printed.

”On the Xth day of the XXth month, the big and little pandas left their mark on this.”

Now, only one lonely panda remains, nostalgic for the other.

Chi Xiaochi put the photo in his heart and mind while making up the concept.

He wanted to make the most of the recording and the “non-existent” photo to convince Zhu.

Chi Xiaochi would not take them to the police, he would keep them to torment Zhu Shoucheng, to teach him the meaning of fear, to make him live in fear of being exposed at any moment, worse than death.

He would still carry a weapon with him and if Zhu Shoucheng dared to rob him violently or burglarise his home, he would kill him himself and then publish the recording and blame him for all of it, in reference to what he had done to Lou Ying.

However, things don’t always turn out as one would hope.

Within a day of Chi Xiaochi’s departure from hospital, Zhu Shoucheng was given two consecutive critical illness notices.

On the third day, Chi Xiaochi received the notice.

Zhu Shoucheng died.

Maybe he killed them, maybe he scared them to death.

…… who knows.

The police station had no clue about this vicious attack.

They couldn’t find the murder weapon, the footprints were completely covered in snow, the young boy who had recently come home with Zhu Shoucheng often asked no questions of the police, his mother was unusually forceful and said it was none of my children’s business, and even the victim himself failed to give a valid testimony before his death.

Considering the question of motive, Lao Dai instead called Chi Xiaochi, who had accused Zhu Shoucheng of sexual assault, for questioning.

But Chi Xiaochi, trained by Dai himself, has learned to answer all questions with “I don’t know”, in a calm manner with a hint of surprise that Dai can’t find a single fault with.

In the end, it was Zi Yu who really helped Chi Xiaochi get off the hook.

Zi Yu said that on the day of the murder, she met Chi Xiaochi on the road after school and took him back to her bachelor hostel, where she cooked him dumplings for dinner.

The low level of local crime-solving skills helped Zhu Shoucheng get off the hook, as well as Chi Xiaochi.

Zi Yu didn’t say a word to Chi Xiaochi after taking him out of the police station.

She has not seen Chi Xiaochi since, and even when she occasionally meets him on the road, Zi Yu pretends not to see him.

…… are as strange as two pieces of drift that have only brushed against each other.

At the end of school one day after leaving the police station, Chi Xiaochi was called by a woman.

She introduced herself, “I’m Gujin’s mother.”

Gujin, the name of the little boy Chi Xiaochi rescued that day.

She took Chi Xiaochi to one of the best local restaurants and told him to order whatever he wanted.

”Goojin was timid enough to come home that day and tell me everything.” The woman spoke of it with a look of pleasure, “The old thing died well.”

”Don’t worry, son. I told Gujin to forget about that incident completely and to say he didn’t know in front of the police, no matter what they ask. Since you saved him, we can’t be heartless.”

Chi Xiaochi smiles, takes a chopstick of the dish and stuffs it into his mouth.

The dish fell down the empty heart into the bottomless abyss.

It is true that revenge is a joyous thing, but the only thing that is hard to resist is the emptiness that comes after it, when the heart is so abruptly drained and bewildered.

Zhu Shoucheng died so quickly that his life evaporated, revealing a huge, hideous hole in Chi Xiaochi’s heart.

This hole appeared the moment Lou Ying fell.

…… is painful.

It hurt so much that he couldn’t cry out.

The guilt characteristic of those who have survived a great disaster fills Chi Xiaochi.

Every day when he opened his eyes, he wondered why it was I who was alive.

Why did Lou Ying fall down the stairs that day?

What if instead of asking for help, he had gone to help Lou Ying?

What if he doesn’t go to Zhu Shoucheng’s house for tuition?

……

Countless questions wove a seamless web of air that wrapped itself around him.

Gradually, opening my eyes every morning became something that required a lot of courage.

It’s so painful, so tiring.

Is it such a sin to live.

Just as he had planned Zhu Shoucheng’s death, Chi Xiaochi began to plan his own death in earnest.

He can’t die at school.

Chi Xiaochi did not hate the school and if he had jumped off the school building or slit his wrists in the school toilets, knowing his parents, he would have been unrelenting in his claim against the school.

He didn’t want to die at home either. He no longer had that strong love-hate for his parents, and home did not mean anything to him, not as a place of hatred or a place of peace of mind worthy of being a place to return to.

In other locations it is also bad to jump where it depreciates in value.

Later, he selected a bridge.

It would be a good place to fall off the bridge, into the water and be carried away by it.

In the next monthly exam, Chi Xiaochi came first.

No one could tell how he was feeling.

In the eyes of his classmates, he was no different from the usual.

There was a ruckus: “University bully, buy dinner.”

Chi Xiaochi smiled and said, “Definitely.”

He did invite his close friends to dinner, and to avoid leaving them in the dark, Chi Xiaochi delayed for several days before climbing the bridge he had been watching for so long, late at night, in the middle of nowhere.

In the darkness of the night, the water cannot be seen, only heard gurgling.

Chi Xiaochi imagines that the river will take him to the nearest river, and that he will go downstream, away from this screaming place, wrapped in the waves like a rolling baby panda, rolling and rolling, until he reaches the person he wants to meet, then lying at his feet, hugging his trouser legs, never to leave again.

…… is too tiring.

Chi Xiaochi is overjoyed at the thought of not having to wake up in the morning.

He left a suicide note on himself and leapt into the rolling waves.

His suicide note consisted of only six words.

”I came. I abstain.”

……

It is here that the resonant strings of time take a subtle turn.

This is the story of Chi Xiaochi in a parallel world, and Chi Xiaochi has experienced it all, no less.

He smashed Zhu Shoucheng’s head in that snowy night, scared Zhu Shoucheng to death in the hospital, and sat quietly on the parapet by the bridge that night.

The only difference is that he didn’t jump.

Just because, the original Chi Xiaochi suddenly remembered something.

…… What happens to dog meat when no one feeds it.

Does he have bad eyes and doesn’t know he’s dead, does he turn around and look for him?

Could someone have been given rat poison for screaming too loudly?

By this, he thought of more.

Chi Xiaochi thinks about Lou Ying’s room and how, if she died, it would be emptied and filled with baby things.

Who else but him could really remember Lou Ying and never forget him for the rest of his life.

Chi Xiaochi looked at the darkness beneath his feet, lifted his leg and flipped back over the outer railing.

He walked slowly back home, sleepwalking through the city in small steps, and eventually, came to the Beimang Cemetery.

Chi Xiaochi somewhat awkwardly scales the iron fence, finds Lou Ying’s headstone and leans against it reassuringly.

He brushed the back of his hand against the headstone and thought, “It’s good that Lou can’t see me like this now.

In his mind, he will always be the willful, naive, childish brother, not a murderer with a heart full of calculation and blood on his hands.

How nice.

……

After reading this world line, which was almost identical to everything he remembered, Chi Xiaochi put down his glass.

This body is too young to withstand the stimulation of foreign wine.

…… He was a little drunk.

So Chi Xiaochi’s alcohol-paralysed nerves did not allow him to react appropriately when a man came up to him, slightly out of breath.

He looked up with a smiling expression, “There you are ……”

The visitor, however, did not hesitate to embrace him directly into his arms.

Chi Xiaochi was hugged and confused.

The physical contact made him instinctively resist a little, but the familiar smell, the body heat, made him lose his breath involuntarily.

Chi Xiaochi was just about to say something as she lay softly in the man’s arms, when she looked up and saw a familiar figure in front of the public school across the street.

Zhu Shoucheng and a short boy in his second year walk out of school laughing and talking.

He looked at the boys with eyes full of a strange light that screamed sickening.