Slimes Can Dream Too!

Slimes were the lowest ranked monsters of the food chain, and they were useful for mostly scrubbing jobs, but for a dragon’s familiar to be named Bouncy was a bit…. He assumed that the dragon was just lazy to name it properly. He thought to himself, Kalgilm probably saw the slime bouncing, and named it Bouncy.

NeAffronti met with Elkiesel and Bouncy just a little ways from the lair.

“Welcome, NeAffronti sir.” Elkiesel gave a polite bow.

NeAffronti dropped by from time to time to look around the lair to offer a helping hand to Elkiesel. Elkiesel very much liked NeAffronti. Bouncy, of course, loved NeAffronti as well. Bouncy rapidly hopped to NeAffronti.

“NeA. Hi.”

Slimes did not have vocal chords, so in order to make any sound, they had to jiggle their entire body. Thus, Bouncy tended to keep her words as short as possible. NeAffronti did not mind that Bouncy talked to him casually, as if they were long time friends.

“Have you been well, Bouncy?”

NeAffronti hugged Bouncy. He gifted Bouncy a pastel pink azalea flower full of honey. Bouncy momentarily admired the azalea flower and then began to consume it. Elkiesel felt reassured watching Bouncy eating the azalea.

Slimes could survive many years without food. However, they would gradually lose the ability to move and their bodies would also slowly shrink smaller and smaller. Though Bouncy was a named familiar of a dragon, if it continued to abstain from eating, it too would gradually become weaker and smaller.

Kalgilm noticed the fuss and came slowly crawling outside. He noticed Bouncy happily eating from NeAffronti’s hand and felt betrayed once again.

‘It didn’t even want to look at the worms I gathered tirelessly from the mud.’

NeAffronti let Bouncy down after it finished eating the azalea.

“Bouncy, roll.”

Bouncy looked toward NeAffronti and rolled around where he stood.

“This kid didn’t forget. Good job.”

NeAffronti took out some strawberries he saved ahead of time from his subspace. Bouncy happily popped a strawberry into its mouth. It was now the color of an azalea. After it fully digested a strawberry, Bouncy began rolling around NeAffronti.

‘It took 10 years for it to learn one command from me.’

“Come. Hand, let’s try this. Hand.”

NeAffronti placed a single strawberry on his hand. Bouncy transformed a part of its body into a limb and snatched the strawberry from NeAffronti. Bouncy rolled the strawberry slowly toward its body and popped it into its mouth.

“Good job. I thought you would forget because it’s been 50 years since I’ve last seen you, but you properly remember. My dear Bouncy is so amazing. You are so cute, my Bouncy.”

While NeAffronti continued to hug and praise Bouncy, he felt dark energies seeping from behind him.

‘Who’s did he claim Bouncy to be?’

The dark energy looked like a halo around Kalgilm’s body.

‘What’s wrong with him? I think he became twisted after sleeping for 200 years. Did he have a nightmare?’

NeAffronti let Bouncy down, and shamelessly greeted Kalgilm.

“Have you been well?”

“That’s why I’m awake. How about you?”

Kalgilm stood with crossed arms and glared at NeAffronti with furrowed brows as if he was facing off against an enemy.

‘This kid,’

NeAffronti was irritated seeing Kalgilm act so inhospitbily when Kalgilm had been the one to call him. He wished he could punch him.

‘Jeez. He may be three thousand years old on the outside, but inside he’s only three. It’s laughable of me to expect a three year old to act like an adult.’

“I’ve been well. I’ve helped to take care of your lair while you were sleeping. Don’t you have any words of gratitude for me?” NeAffronti retorted with a forceful smile.

“I didn’t ask you to do it, so why should I thank you?”

“I would have slapped you if you were a human. You stupid sod.”

NeAffronti entered the lair together with Kalgilm.

NeAffronti began to chatter at Kalgilm about his time adventuring out in the world, in hopes of encouraging Kalgilm.

“A Kingdom called Blown has formed in my territory. Mercenaries make the core of the Kingdom and they are quite entertaining. You should go see the place for yourself, and you’ll see how fun this world is. Do you remember when I helped the Emperor of Eupan 600 years ago, they gave me a noble title? Whenever you want to visit around outside, you can use that title. Go for a leisure trip out in the Kingdom of Blown. You can really feel the energy of a newly formed kingdom.”

“No thanks.” Kalgilm replied coldly.

Green dragons were generous and gentle by nature, and NeAffronti was a typical green dragon. However, NeAffronti also had a limit to his generosity. Kalgilm had tested the limits of his patience more than once.

‘What ever shall we do with this homebody dragon?’

“Why did you call for me if you didn’t want to hear about my trip outside?” NeAffronti asked coldly.

Kalgilm commanded Elkiesel to take Bouncy to a place it won’t be able to listen to their conversation.

“El, go take Bouncy out on a walk around the area.”

“Go out to play with Falcon.” Kalgilm began to ask about Blown Kingdom when the three left together.

“I need ingredients to make a triangle rice ball. You go out for leisure trips with humans frequently, so you should have a food storage in your lair, right? I need seaweed, rice, and meat. I will give you some jewels for them.”

“Tangle rice ball? What’s that?” NeAffronti adventured a lot, but he’d never heard of a triangle rice ball.

“It’s a food and I need seaweed, rice, and meat. These are frequently stocked by humans.”

“What’s a seaweed?”

“It’s a black piece of paper.”

Rice and meat are consumed by humans, but humans don’t eat paper. NeAffronti thought only goats ate paper.

“Do goats eat tangle rice balls? Are you looking for goat feed?”

“Humans eat this.”

“How do humans eat paper?”

“They do.”

Kalgilm told of what he saw in his dream.

“How do you know that? You’ve never even seen a human for yourself.”

Kalgilm lost his words.

“There are many types of rice, what kind of rice do you need? Do you need the sticky rice from Aso region? Or would the long crumbling kind from the YangXing region? Maybe the smooth soft kind from Roan? Do you need it for stir fry or bibimbap? Do you need beef, pork, or chicken? Sheep? Rabbit? Do you need it to be marinated or just plain raw? If you want it marinated, what kind of sauce do you need?”

Kalgilm felt trapped in a corner.

He only knew of the existence and name of triangle rice balls. However, he didn’t understand the lives of humans so he couldn’t figure out the fine details like the ingredients of the rice ball. He repeated the words of the young girl in his dreams to NeAffronti.

“Jeonju Bibim” ¹⁾

“Huh?”

“Tuna and mayo. Spam and Kimchi ²⁾. Haven’t you heard of that before?”

“Whaaat? No. What’s that? Who did you hear that from?”

NeAffronti couldn’t understand a single word that Kalgilm spoke. Within his vast pool of knowledge, things like triangle rice ball, kimchi, mayo, and spam were not included.

‘Isn’t this guy just dreaming wild dreams?’

“I saw it in my dreams.”

His prediction was spot on and NeAffronti looked to Kalgilm pitifully.

“This homebody dragon. Dreams and reality are different. What kind of dream are you dreaming where humans are eating paper? You don’t understand humans so you are dreaming such weird things. Humans are not goats. They can’t eat paper. You’re such an ignorant dragon. You must see humans for yourself for you to understand them.”

NeAffronti scolded Kalgilm. Kalgilm had no choice but to silently accept NeAffronti’s scolding since he had indeed never seen a human for himself.

‘Now that he knows my weakness, he will use this to make fun of me for the next thousand years.’ Kalgilm changed the topic of their conversation.

“They put meat or vegetables in the center, and then wrap it in a white thing. Then they will wrap it in a black thing a final time on the outside. Is there anything like this?”

“Could it be Yepuren³⁾?”

NeAffronti tried to think of the closest thing he tried from the human world for Kalgilm.

“Yepuren?”

“They will put whipped cream on top of fruit, then they will pour chocolate on top of that. This is probably what you’ve seen. Fruit and whipped cream, then chocolate. I have it in my subspace already so I’ll give it to you.”

NeAffronti took out some glass jars which contained whipped cream, chocolate, and strawberries.

Kalgilm thought of the triangle rice ball from his dream. There was no triangle rice ball which used chocolate.

“I don’t think this is it.”

“I’ve adventured the world more than thirty times, believe in me. Other than Yepuren, there is nothing that matches your description.” NeAffronti said with confidence.

“Do you know how to make Yepuren? Shall I teach you?” NeAffronti said like a superior.

“I know how.” Kalgilm didn’t want to talk with NeAffronti anymore so he lied.

“Really?”

“Yes, I do.”

“Really? Do you know how whipped cream is made? How will you use the chocolate?”

“Whipped cream is made of milk, and chocolate will melt when you put it in your mouth. I’ll cut it into little pieces when I use it. Do you think I’m that dumb? You call yourself a dragon when you don’t even know what a JeonJu Bibim is.”

“What’s a Jazz Bibi?”

“Do you know what tuna kimchi⁴⁾ is? Do you know Nuclear fire chicken noodles⁵⁾? How about tako wasabi⁶⁾ ? You don’t even know Tobiko maki⁷⁾! Get lost!” Kalgilm used all the knowledge he learned in his dream to chase NeAffronti from his lair.

Kalgilm stood in front of the three foods and anguished. NeAffronti had pretended to be a chef while adventuring out in the world. However, Kalgilm had never cooked once in his life ever since he was born.

Kalgilm thought of the time he saw the young girl make a triangle rice ball. She would gently peel off the thing called plastic and it became a triangle rice ball.

‘First something should be in the center, so the strawberry should be placed there. Then the whipped cream must properly wrap around the strawberry so we need some kind of mold.’

Kalgilm didn’t have anything like a mold in his lair.

‘Should I melt the chocolate or cut it into tiny pieces and stick it onto the outside?’

Kalgilm didn’t have any sort of pots or foods stocked inside his lair.

‘Do I need to call NeAffronti again?’

He would lose too much face if he called NeAffronti again after chasing him out just a moment ago.

‘I’m a dragon. There is no way a dragon will be unable to make a triangle rice ball!’